Theories

Dating Theory: The ‘Nice Magazine Cover’


Why do I enjoy coming up with theories from time to time? Because while scientists, professors, and famous people rightly use facts as the ultimate arbiter of truth, I like to experiment and analyze every-day-life situations that usually only credit or discredit ideas / frameworks that some theorist has previously invented, but adding a little more humor, spice, sauciness to it.

A few days ago, my friend Adria and I were enjoying lunch during our work break, and she told me a story she has heard of a couple of days before. It’s the typical story that girlfriends share in the attempt to either have a laughter, have empathy, or… thinking of a solution!

“Once upon a time, a girl and a boy met (just for the romantic side of it)

She was new in the little town and didn’t know anybody, and one evening, with dreamy-eyes-of-a-dear and delight, she crashes an ‘after hour’ party and meets the Boy.

After some time – a few weeks according to close sources – and some flirty talk and smile, the two go on a date. What for her seemed a nice, caring and listening moment where she could express herself and her thoughts, for him it was an emotional torment that he didn’t except for a first date.
A couple of hours later, the boy couldn’t wait for to go back home… Within a little time, he had learnt the most he could possible ask for, so much information and insight thoughts that seemed too much for a ‘first date’.  The image of what initially seemed like an Interesting and Intriguing Girl suddenly couldn’t fit the same frame.

A week goes by and the Girl asks the Boy out. But surprisingly, he keeps being busy and unavailable. The Girl, not sure of what is going on, doesn’t give up and keeps calling and getting the same reply “Sorry, I’m very busy these days”
The Girl tries again the following day, “I’ll be around your area, do want to meet?” and he said “No, you know what? the gang is meeting at the Prancing Pony Pub, let’s go there!”, “But I want to see you”, “… but I want to see the gang, not just you”.


The ‘Nice Magazine Cover’ Theory
As she kept telling the story, I couldn’t help but thinking of what I would do in her shoes, possible scenarios, detours in crucial moments, and bla bla bla

And suddenly, it hit me! The Girl probably didn’t know of how important a first date is, so in order to turn the edge into her direction she  needs to apply a new approach, the Nice Magazine Cover strategy! I’m sure every girl on the planet knows what I mean, they just didn’t think of it with this name.

First dates are crucial, is when first impressions hit the hardest so it’s important to display the best of ourselves because it  will be THIS memory the one that will endure the most in the mind of the other one. And actually for girls is even easier, we just need to smile and be nice.
Therefore, appearance, scent, smile, posture, and speaking will be the first and only things under consideration!

So, back to the story. If the Girl wants to attract the Boy again, she needs to apply the following strategy. Let’s imagine the same Guy standing in front of a kiosk full of magazines.

She needs to go from “looking” like this:

To “looking” like this:

If you guys were standing in front of a magazines kiosk, wouldn’t this one catch your eye if it was next to the previous one?  🙂
And by the way, this is not a guys-only rule.

5 comments

  1. Interesting…
    1) On the thoeries, I think everyone develop theories, even the ones that don’t know they do it…
    2) About the girls persistence… “caling, calling and calling every day” will not work. Though this is something that women and men do…
    3) Great comparison on the magazines, (though… just one correction… America is a continent, not a country, the falg you have in the second magazine belongs to united states of America, which is a country).

  2. Dear Mario 🙂 thank you for your feedback!
    About 2), totally agree, I mean, the story I referred to aimed to the girl’s attitude, but as you say it is something that both men and women do, I will find soon a story (easy) that will draw a parallel line just so that we can all see how similar we are to each other.

    Have you watched the movie He’s Just Not That Into You? It should be a MUST for many, really!

  3. Mario is correct in that repeatedly calling is the worst thing that one could do. One should create an image of scarcity rather than desperation.

    The first date is important. But one, especially a guy, should lay the groundwork during the first encounter as much as possible. The more attraction that is developed during the first encounter, the more successful the first date will be. I see a lot of guys make the mistake of thinking they have sealed the deal when they get a girl’s phone number and walk away. However, unless they have established some sort of connection in the time it took to get the girl’s number, the chance of the girl flaking is pretty high. Make a strong impression/connection at the first encounter and then walk away at the peak before the conversation has a chance to stall. Then at the first date, dress well and be ready with venue changes, etc.

  4. Excellent theory! I love the choice of magazine covers that you used to illustrate your point… It’s a totally applicable theory for both sexes!

  5. In India they have a saying: “the first impression is the last”.

    I suggest the second magazine is appropriate because it presents multiple possibilities. Notice, there are two people there: the model & her doggie.

    The first option is as you say: gentleness with a wonderful smile. But can’t you also be like the little doggie, & suggest to visit the beach with your date? Let him hold you gently while you both just watch the waves in the coolness of the morning breeze? I think that option will work as well.

    I can see this is an old thread, but for me it is new. So, apologies.

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