Dear Reader, Not often I can find a place that fascinates me like North Korea. Its existence, its political system, its isolation, run by a psychopathic line of warlords.. Honestly, what’s not to be curious about? Kim Il Sung Following the line of obscure topics, It’s time to introduce to you the Kims. North Korea is commonly known as a “communist” country, a label earned due to the Soviet Union and China, and while there have been communist features characterizing the country, over the years the government has shifted from Communism to Image Cult, starting with Kim Il Sung with Soviet assistance, than his far-from-fashion son Kim Jong Il, and nowadays his grandson Kim Jong-un. As any respectable Personality Cult, the Kims are portrayed in infinite stories, filled with greatness, wisdom and miracles. Legends tell that Kim Jong Il was born in a cave with unicorns on Mt. Paektu, that his father could write 10,000 books a year, that also he was very proficient in science, aeronautics, agriculture, medicine, poetry, and all possible disciplines you can imagine. He could control the weather some say. So much is told about the Great Leader, a lot more has been said about the Dear Leader. Not so much is being said about the latest of the Kims, Kim Jong-un. Perhaps it’s because his first trip outside of the country is scheduled to take place this year in May to visit his Russian counterpart, Vladimir Putin. Because we are meant to bring in a little bit of humor, I’ll dedicate this post to the second of the Kims: Kim Jong Il.
Kim Jong Il Allegedly born in a cave under a ray of light in the middle of the night, surrounded by beautiful unicorns, Kim Jong Il was the son of the first leader of North Korea. Unlike his father, Kim Jong Il never looked too well next to his father.
Kim Jong Il for real was born in in 1941 in Vyatskoye, Russia, Kim Jong Il was the short sized brutal dictator master of the propaganda created by his father. He prioritized military might and his own Master in manipulation, he was said to be instead extremely insecure, delusive, and affected by OCD. He indeed claimed he invented burgers. Here are some of the best legends and few real facts about Kim Il Jong: 1- Born in a magical cave under beams of light, unicorns and rainbows. 2- He was a big fan of waterslides: satellites have revealed that in his mansion there is monumental water slide play ground. 3- Terrified of flying: so afraid of flying for fear of terrorist attacks, he only left the country on a super equipped built to resist train. 4- The world greatest sports man: according to official sources, Kim Jong Il was a master in golf. 5- Weather man: like his father, Kim Jong Il inherited the ability of controlling the weather. 6- Never used toilets: because like his father, he didn’t need to. 7- He had many titles: among the best ones are Guiding Sun, Shining Star of Paektu, Dear Leader, Great Man Who Descend from Heaven, Triumphant General. 8- He invented hamburgers: to be more precise, and to quote what the actual North Korean newspaper said, he invented the “double bread with meat”. There are many, many more stories about his greatness. These stories, as marvelous as they sound, are in neat contrast with the living standard and situation of most North Koreans. So when doubt rises about democracy, rights, food quantity, or freedom, you start having defectors. North Korea bans any sort of religion, having the Kims and their worship became the only State religion indirectly. And as in any other religion, heretics and skeptics are still up today punished with death.
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